Term Paper’s Proctologist

YHC had a front row seat at the DTC railroad crossing arm while watching the longest train in the world pass through the city. T’was 5:20 a.m. and YHC still needed to make it to Point Break for the 5:30 Q. Not gonna lie, didn’t think I’d make it, but I did with 30 sec to spare. whew!

After proper introduction as the Fitness Leader for the day and stumbling through a disclaimer, YHC led the PAX on a warm-up jog to the back side of Cinebistro parking lot. It was there that we performed some warm up exercises; all called in perfect cadence by YHC. But, not so fast. After the first warm-up exercise of SSH x 20, some dude comes running up and joins the circle—-he looked like a burly security guard of some sort——but nope, it was Pineapple! dammit, 5 penalty burpees. YHC continued warm-up exercises in perfect cadence: GM—>Michael Phelps, Merkins—>PJs, AirForceOnes, and Saturday Nite Stretch. Smokey stated he had never performed a Saturday Nite Stretch, which was obvious to YHC, but Smokey did state that he performs Tuesday and Thursday Nite stretches once a month. hmmmm.

After a mosey to the parking lot behind Duke Health,
Thang 1: Modified B.O.M.B.S to B.O.M.L.S (LBCs in lieu of Big Boy Sit-ups) were performed with a partner at reps of 25-50-75-100-125. Whilst partner 1 runs through and around the lower parking deck, partner 2 performs said exercises. FlapJack until complete. It was obvious to YHC that nobody counted their reps correctly. Additionally, the stickler Term Paper pointed out that this was technically half B.O.M.B.S because of the half number of reps. Dammit, Term Paper!

Mosey to the bottom of the biggest hill at Waverly Place, and on the way perform some plank series exercises: regular, right arm up, left arm up, low plank hold.
****** Have you ever seen Augmented in a plank position? In regular plank position, you can’t see any of his face. In fact, all you will see are his lovely locks flowing all the way to the ground—-like touching the ground—-hair in car oil/cigarette butts/old chewing gum. It’s beautiful!

Thang 2: At the bottom of the hill, we commence a set of Triple Nickels with 5 Sumo Squat Jumps at top and 5 SSH at bottom. The stickler Term Paper informs me that this is not technically Triple Nickels, but actually only Double Nickels. Dammit, Term Paper!

A brief stop in front of the Duke Medical building for some Freddie Mercs. This is when Term Paper shares with the PAX that this doctor office is where he and his M share the same proctologist and general doctor. Term Paper shares that the doctor asked he and the M on separate occasions about their sex life. Apparently his M stated that it “wasn’t enough”. The PAX wondered if “wasn’t enough” referred to the frequency of whoopee or the size of Term Paper’s manhood. TP indicated that it was probably both.
That story reminded YHC of the time Hoppin’ John went to the doctor. Hoppin’ John went to the doctor to get his willy checked out. Hoppin John went into the exam room and flopped his 1.5″ willy onto the exam table. The doctor looked at it and asked “What’s wrong with it”? Hoppin’ John replied, “It’s swollen”!

Mosey to the Walgreens for
Thang 3: Agility City. Partner up. Partner 1 performs the Bob-and-Weave while partner 2 performs a series of line agility exercises. It was painfully obvious the PAX never perform any lateral movements and coordination was at an all-time low.

Perform a plank series and then mosey to the fountain area behind While Foods, which is where we performed a couple sets of dips and Irkins in front of a couple of wowed spectators. Mosey to the Shovel Flag and meet up with the Cleavages for COT.

COT:
Count-a-rama: 22 with an Honor, some Respects, some mehs, and Hermes.
Name-a-rama.
Announcements: TCP Sawgrass is on for this Sunday at 2 p.m. Hermes leading charity golf tourny: Registration is up for the annual F3 Carpex Golf tournament on 10/4 at Lonnie Poole. Benefiting the Mabopane Foundation. Register to play and sponsor here: https://mabopanekids.org/golf-tournament/
***** You can even sponsor Hermes’ Hole……ewwwww.
Term Paper took us out like a champ.
Hoppin’ John provided excellent TrunkCoffee.

twas a pleasure.
luvyou, Flip Flop

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