Picture taken from my dumbphone at 0637 in Cary, NC.
11:06PM – Kwik Stop: “I know it’s late notice but I won’t be able to Q bo tommorow, if someone else could pick it up for me I’d really appreciate it.”
11:07PM – Me, thinking to myself: Hmm, it’s late. But I’m posting tomorrow anyway. Might as well snag that Q.
11:07PM – Callahan: “I got you homie! What was your plan, I’ll execute it and you can still get partial credit”
11:09PM – Kwik Stop: “Mostly just sprinting the parking deck to see if I could get someome to merlot. Thanks a ton for taking it.”
11:09PM – Me, thinking again: oh hell naw…this man is a monster
2:33AM – Me, dreaming: (to a group of 30 PAX) “MORE RUNNING, MAGGOTS! WE DON’T LEAVE UNTIL ONE OF YOU PUKES! WHO’S GUNNA BE THE HERO?!?”
2:34AM – Me, awake and sweating profusely, despairing: But I don’t want to be a bad guy!
5:15AM – Me, sitting on the thrown, cooking up a plan, still thinking: You know what, actually? It feels like a good day to be a bad guy.
5:45AM – Me, to a PAX of 8: “Let’s go!”
Nine PAX arrived at BO this lovely morning, most of whom thought they were getting a Kwik butt-whoopin’. When they all found out I’d grabbed a late night Q substitute, there were mumbles and groans, but mostly sounds of relief.
Huh, thanks for the vote of confidence fellas.
“Nah, Cally, you’re fine,” one PAX explained. “It’s just that Kwik Stop is a beast.”
“Yeah”, says another PAX. “I was planning to go to Bounty Hunters today, but when I saw this morning that you grabbed the Q, I knew coming here would be the safer bet. No way I was signing up for a KS Q.”
Guys, really?
“I mean, no offense,” starts another PAX, “but have to seen how hard Kwik Stop sprints? Have you ever sprinted that fast?”
Wait, what the hell is going on here?
Yet another PAX: “Don’t listen to these jokers, Cally. I, for one, am thrilled you’re Qing today. You write the best back blasts, even if your beat downs are a little lack-luster.”
Oh, for the love of…
87 degrees, 96% humidity, partially cloudy with the sun juuuuust starting to peak through the treeline. 8 smartasses and 1 downtrodden Q take of out of the lot headed to the fountain for:
WARM UP
Circled up on the “stage” for:
Good Mornings
Merkins
SSH
Squats
The mumblechatter hit hard when I called “standard squats” and proceeded to do sumo squats. Relentless whining and griping resulted in no one counting. Given that this train was about to go off the rails, YHC made a quick move to reset the group with a few burpess.
THANG 1
Job down to the parking garage and partner up for Catch me if you can with partner 1 running in reverse, partner 2 doing four, yes four hand-release merkins before giving chase. All the way to the top of the deck.
THANG 2
Partner one puts their feet up on the wall (about 1/2 of a BTTW, unless you’re of more diminutive stature) while Partner 2 does a shuttle run through 8 parking spaces. Flapjack. Then again with people’s chair and 7 spaces. BTTW and 6. PC and 5. BTTW and 4. PC and 4. BTTW and 4. PC and 5 spaces. BTTW and 6. And finally, PC and 7 spaces.
THANG 3
Split into two groups, one goes down the West stairwell while the other goes down the East. Trying to keep distance as best as we can. Head over to the fountain for 15 each of Dips, Irkens, and Dirkens. Head back to the church, finishing with a Billy Run.
It was then that the wind cried…
MARY
15 LBCs in cadence. It’s a wrap
COT
Count: 9 Kwik-mouthed dimwits
Name-o-rama: Still 9. 2 Respects, 1 HATE, 6 meh
Announcements: See slack for deets on the not-so-virtual Virtual Sasquatch, happening this weekend over at The Green Mile
Prayers: TAPs for the men of Naperville as they lost a brother this week, prayers for his familly (M and 2 young children – he was 36). TAPs for the family of Coxswain’s Brother’s friend who recently died in a motorcylce crash.
NMS
- When I saw the Q spot open up at BO this morning, I couldn’t help but think about 2018 when Carpex really started to explode and we had a glut of new Q’s. I remember it being incredibly difficult to get on the Q sheet for certain workouts and I remember Burt always being the first to jump into a voided Q spot whenever the opportunity arose. Being that Burt and I come from the same bloodline (sort of, but not really at all), I felt compelled to jump in and lead to the best of my abilities.
- I didn’t do that, mind you, because it was 11:07PM and I wasn’t going to spend time planning a beatdown
- It was still hard though. We sprinted a lot, or at least a few of us did, from time to time. Kwik Stop would have been…well, proud isn’t really the right word. Neither is ‘satisfied’. Pacified, maybe?
- Press On wasn’t there. Portugal spent the night at O’Hare for the third time in his life. Muggo story diving into the nitty-gritty details coming out in September 2020. Stay tuned.
- Who else wasn’t there? Kwik Stop. We’ve covered this.
- Burt was there. Sassy as ever. Passed along some wisdom to boot: Never wear your best shoes to F3, lest you suffer the fate of Zion Williamson #shoegate
- Tanger was there, too. He scared the living hell outta me. All I heard was a voice, but I couldn’t locate it. He had parked in the next lot over and was yelling through the hedge to ask if we were F3 dudes. Thought for a second I was hearing voices.
- Term Paper was there. He struggled to get out of his “OMG Becky” tank at the end, given his bum wing and the fact that the tank was soaked in sweat and just a wee bit sticky. It was fine though. Burt helped him out of it in a similar fashion to what you might see one college coed doing to help another drunk coed out of his shoes before passing out on the couch on the balcony of the Lambda Chi house.
- I hope that visual hits with you. It did for me.
- Viking was there. Young’un cycled in from Raleigh. Just 8 miles he said. I asked if he lost himself in the music. He didn’t get it.
- HGTV was there, cruising up in the family van. No worries, still repping CPR Construction with the custom plate on the front of said family van. He asked me about the TAP podcast I keep talking about. He didn’t know what it was called, just that it started with a T. When I told him it was a podcast, he lost interest in the subject.
- It’s fine.
- Really, it is.
- <crying emoji>
- Compound W was there. Come to think of it, I didn’t really get a chance to talk with him much. I did, however, get to hear his patented “come on” chant that he does to himself. One of my favorite things in F3. Not kidding at all about that. It’s verifiably great.
- Build-A-Bear was there, fresh outta rehab with a new lease on life. Shoulder rehab, that is. Still 9 or so months away from 100%, but that’s just what the docs think. They must not know the Bear too well.
- Coxswain was there, and he too rode his bike in. Didn’t know if you knew this, but Coxswain has the best Tank Top fashion sense in Carpex. I mean, unless being lifted up by Cherie Berry is your jam.
- Lastly, I was there. No fear, Press on and Prodigal, your site was in good hands with a few DangerZone Site-Q Emeritii in the house. We left her better than we found her.
- The sunrise at the top of the new parking garage is undefeated in Carpex.
- See you next week.
Callahan♦