…is absolutely not 100 lbs. of blueberries. It’s that little smile that creeps unbidden to your face when you realize that you have the Q the following morning and can unleash the pent up fury and frustration of three days of - driving, lines, bad eating, a flat pillow, and a 2-year-old that more closely resembles the Banshee from Darby O’Gill and the Little People than the adorable baby you once knew - on an unsuspecting PAX. Poor PAX. Poor, poor PAX that did the Murph. Disclaimer: I had an awesome time this weekend, but the litany of vacation woes above still sucks.
Kilmer brought along another FNG, so as Callahan tore into the lot on two wheels to remind Ma Bell he was supposed to Q FWD this AM, I laid down the disclaimer. Katniss must have missed this worrying about Callahan’s James Bond-esque, screeching-tires, 360 donut, askew parking job right next to him. That, or maybe he was just laughing at Ma Bell’s puzzled look about which site he was supposed to be at today. Although, if anyone can simultaneously post at one site while Q-ing another, NanTan can. Sorry Ma Bell, this one’s mine.
Beaker’s Beginnings (The Warm-up)
Jog up to the upper parking lot…no, the one on the left. Circle up for:
20x Windmills
20x Good Mornings
20x Side Straddle Hops, with a healthy dose of Fast Freaky Franklin’s Frontal Fellowship Form (TM). I don’t think he understands just how many VQs have been dissuaded by that one move alone. Don’t worry brothers, I’ll co-Q and take the warm-up for ya'!
20x Willie Mays Hayes
As you can see from the warm-ups, I was rather worried about everyone’s legs being loose and limber, but, enough of that. Count off, 21…of course it’s an odd number. Oh well, It was still time for…
Beaker’s Beatdown (The Thang)
Jog down to the pitch (that’s soccer field for everyone except Sky Blue) and grab a partner at the bottom of the mid-field circle. Goose and Calli graciously permitted YHC to join their group. Exercise was: Partner 1 sprint to the other side of the circle and back while Partner 2 (or 3) drops for some Merkins. Now you geometrically-inclined geniuses can complain about circles not having “ends” and “sides” and “bottoms” all you want, my Q, my nomenclature. Franklin in his haste to complete the exercise failed to listen to instructions and ran all the way to the end-line and back. Sorry Franklin, there is a LOT more where that came from. Move back to the blue line (Lady’s LAX?) and repeat with squats. Move back to the penalty box (18yd line for ‘Mericans) and repeat with merkins. Move back to the goal box (6yd line for ‘Mericans) and repeat with squats. Move back to the fence (fence for ‘Mericans) and repeat with people’s chair. The panting and lack of mumble-chatter told me it was time to slow things down. Jog down to the shelter and grab some bench for:
1-legged squats, 10 each leg
10x pull-ups
20x L-R step-ups
10x pull-ups
20x box-jumps
5x pull-ups*
1 partner at a time, other partner was in plank or squat hold.
The mumble-chatter was picking up, so it seemed like the PAX had a second wind. Good, they’ll need it.
Franklin led us on a SLOW mosey down to the basketball courts(cause, Franklin) although Kilmer said he could beat Franklin in the slow mosey any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Partner 1 bear crawl a basketball court length and back while Partner 2 is balls to the wall.** Flapjack. Partner 1 bunny hops down and back while Partner 2 Side Straddle Squats. Flapjack. Partner 1 crab walks to the end and back while Partner 2 Aussie Mountain Climbs*** and ****. Pretty sure I was tasting bile at this point, so it was time to call Mary for some relief.
Beaker’s Bellies (The Mary)
20x LBC
20x Hello Dolly, brought to you by Callahan, which sadly meant the catcalls were pretty weak
20x Box-cutters
15x Peter-Parker-Peter
And we’re outta time. And no merlot to be seen…well done.
Beaker’s Benediction (The COT)
Name-o-rama: 20 PAX + 1 FNG.***** Kilmer’s other 2.0 must have seen the bounce in Broseph’s step and said, “gimme some of that!”. Recent NC State grad living back home…so…many…NC State….jokes…..must…..refrain. TEMPORARILY as he heads off this summer for a ministry internship. Whew, glad I bit my tongue. “Boomerang” and “Failure to Launch” fell flat. But FNG volunteered that he loves to sleep, earning him the nickname Van Winkle, welcome.
Prayers for Saban’s neighbor who has suffered two losses in the past year
Prayers for Callahan’s road trip, that his wife might have patience with him over such a long duration of confined travel (we recently heard how cranky he can be)
YHC shared my own struggles with anger and the unrelenting call to be patient in the face of trying circumstances (I again reference the Banshee)…no, more than patient. Vibrant, excited, encouraging, faithful, and hopeful to be playing the long game of raising a child that will love her family, others, and the Lord. I passed along James 1:19, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” as a reminder to myself of what the goalposts are and how far I still have to go.
YHC took us out with words that were barely audible as I was still struggling to catch my breath, made all the more difficult by the aroma of hard-worked men all around me. Well done today, gents. I threw what I could at y’all and you kept rising.
NMS *I try my best to put a good face on the pain I am feeling as the Q, but sometimes I am crushed and gassed and audible so I can save face and not spill the merlot..or pinot noir as it was in this case. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the challenge of leading always makes me push a little harder and is exceptionally rewarding. I will co-Q with anyone who wants to give it a go.
**No, Callahan, a basketball court is not 60 yards long
***I don’t hate you Broseph, I just really want to see grown men cry. #sarcasm. Truth be told, if the PAX aren’t complaining, I didn’t do my job
****Somebody buy Old Maid a globe. These were AUSTRALIAN mountain climbers, as in down under, as in g’day, as in kangaroos and koalas and Crocodile Dundee. I am about 99% certain the accent you were counting in was Austrian, as in Ah-Nold and Alps and Lederhosen.
*****There has been at least 1 FNG at each of my past 4 Qs, which is awesome. Callahan remarked that he barely recognized the FOD crew. That isn’t entirely because the last time I saw him at FOD he was two-wheeling it in in a champagne gold Malibu sans car seat, but rather a testament to the continued growth in F3 Carpex. And other recent additions, such as Madman and HiLiter to name two, weren’t even there. It’s awesome to see and be a part of. Keep it up!
Until next time.